what are we in love

undefeated by the horrible racket coming from the flat next door, i double down on intent. white as a sheet you turned, the lip service gave you form not substance. the tattoos we got helped us endure. black was the ink not knowing what to write, gone for a day without nourishment. how can i tell you, it is only in your head? comprised of particulate matter. just like me you’re unreal sometimes. it’s complicated. today i won’t stand behind you. no. the splinters of our lives they glint in the sun. what are we, in love?   #katyamills

cold steel got love

cold steel got love 
by Katya Mills 


i remember this well. the cold steel in your eyes reflected off the glass of high rise buildings and bottlecaps rolled flat into the street. in opposition to the glossy sky, the kinda deep blue you rarely see anymore in a city. we got together around the time Drake cut his first album which went viral before viral was an expression. the best album. life got crazy for us back then, the whole of us, maybe a core of ten or twenty related intrinsically to a greater constellation, maybe fifty or sixty or more popping off the skin of the larger community. a bunch of anti-establishment mad motherfuckers with nowhere to go just live for today. you won me over quickly, at a time when i was in a lot of pain, my cousin had died, i couldn’t make the funeral, my job was hell and life was like a bad breakup. your life was hell and we both knew nothing of a future until it appeared and it was us. something special had arrived. sometimes Hollywood comes out of nowhere, anywhere, thin air like. now Hollywood is Hollywood and behind the scenes it’s all one giant character assassination. but it’s a damn good show if that’s what it takes to create it. you cannot help but fall in love with it. everything decompensates around it. between us we formed a concept. it was our little secret and there could be no dissent. when you feel this, you know this. magic. real end of the rainbow shit. storybook status. like we already made history, before we made it. cold steel got love like us. cold steel got love.

starbound days

the one i hoped against hope to love in the starbound days took apart the sum of my words and selected from them a single choice, out of context, and left me, dissolute, with the remainder. i burned through nights, furiously attending my reduction. i did not rest until it was done. out in the street one dawn, shutting the door quietly behind, i carried the hearty broth to the needy  #katyamills