like a stranger

yes 

you burned me again

reigniting the past through your dirty broken 

magnifying lens

hurt

i turned away from this nonsense

and toward my aunt whom you told me

in the same breath

died

harboring the question

have you no heart? 

to me

you are like

a stranger

#katyamills

do over

Not all was well, there was a zap and i got zapped, I don’t know why it was me but it was, i didn’t need a charge this morning i already had my green tea extracted and my acid was lactic the ultra didactic. Someone was having a bad day. Someone really hurt me and thought it was okay. Someone deserted me and i got zapped. What can I say? Someone didn’t mean it, they were having a bad day? I wanted to have patience I wanted to be tolerant I wanted to be loving I wanted to be kind. But i got zapped and i kinda lost it, today, not all was well so i gave myself away and traded bullshit for bullshit on a five minute text exchange in the pits of interpersonal refuse calling out a hater like i had nothing to lose. But i lost it. For a moment i lost my sunshine my peace of mind and got zapped. Oh well. I’m gonna forgive myself and start the day over.

atomically bombed

Today i saw a man hold a cat in his arms, loving it like a child. Today i got so very tight in the chest that it hurt.

An unfortunate dispute with a toxic young woman, whose touch like unconscious betrayal. Yet close to my years on this earth.

The warmth vibrating for almost hours, before the body, dehydrate.

The cold-blooded toxicity poured freely into my vessel. I swear i tried to dam her! But unimpeded rhythms are to live by. And i need to know how you really feel.

And we could have been sisters.
And we could have been brothers.
Maybe, some day, we could have been lovers.

No use. All i could do was hold myself high and separate, in the end. For feeling all my feelings to the end. Even the most celebrated among us, shy away from great pain.

I will be the conduit of all the worlds triumphs and tragedies.
I will take it on and let it all go.
I will be forced on my knees, to find some disparate peace.

We all earned our place on this pounded round earth. With our gods. We run around circles, figure eights. Atomically bombed.