proliferation of books

working i made barely enough money

to pay off the service repairs the utilities

groceries petrol clothes hair and nails

taxes insurance credit and mortgage

license registration renewals…

with what remained i

bought and gave away 



beyond the wildest dreams

following your convictions and craft to they desperate ends will appear to others like superstitions and even a great waste of talent and time. you will be labeled if not belittled in this world where one is supposed to abandon one’s dreams and visions and face reality. though devoted and even spiritually fulfilled, you will feel like you got crossed. you will be lonely and almost bitter by common society’s rejection of you. you will be aching sore and if you are anything like me, stubborn. swore and demanded more and doubled down. they will tell you your stuff is no good, for if it were everyone would be reading you. this is a lie. you will be tempted to lie to yourself, too. do not. go all in and why? because devotion is uncommon and rare. keep at it, with self abandon, and, i promise you, the kind of wealth beyond the wildest dreams   #katyamills

introducing the no see ems

while reading books by all my favorite authors 

all of whom are dead 

i let the room

and gave the stage to the no see ems 

they put on a punk flying show beyond compare

demonstrating how unreflexive

we truly are   


book review


Eileen by Ottessa Moshfegh

My rating: 3 of 5 stars

I am excited to have found Ottessa and I very much respect her as a contemporary. She has a unique voice and her characters are so flawed and human, all of them. I found this story to be incredibly compelling out the gate! I was happy to be inside Eileen’s head, as she has some wild imagination in her train wreck of a life. The characters around her were no less compelling, especially as she sized each one of them up. I will be reading more books by this author, the next being My Year of Rest and Relaxation. I’m currently reading this book in paperback, which is a pleasant change after so many e-books. Only problem is I have to use a headlamp after dark. Anyways, it’s the kind of thing I could see Eileen doing. Wearing a headlamp while reading in the attic, and her dad coming up there to call her names and her wishing he would get struck in the head by a falling icicle. The only major disappointment of this story to me was the ending. I don’t know exactly why I was disappointed. Something about the use of the narrator as an older woman looking back on her life didn’t work for me. And just the outcome of the story didn’t work for me. It wasn’t really credible or natural an ending. Nevertheless, I was left feeling happy I picked the book up and for sure would recommend it to some people but not my parents. They don’t like the stories I write, either. So that’s a real compliment.

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