i want to be a watercolor so i can wash away

i used to want to be a sharpie

i was a stillness they could focus on

absorbing heat and sun and sky and sound

the city only a few miles away i got on wheels and rolled the fuck away

these words they beat you up at night

you wonder how the mouths had the nerve

to let them through the teeth

i forgive easy

happiness was once so easy to find

like an astronaut chicken in walmart

butter. tomato onion. pepper. garlic

i was full of anxiety and depression i

could not seem to unrelate myself to them i

turned to fast food in the pandemic i

couldn’t change the channel i

took extra time lining my eyes

with chocolate maybelline i

took great care with my lashes

to make em like japanese wood

carvings of waves

i want to be a watercolor

so i can wash away



i am walking home before midnight

the city crackles with explosives the

heaviest ones shake the ground and 

resound against the pop pop pop the

whistling with definite small caliber 

gunfire shot off by the rebels 

among us. the powder and sulfur

permeates the heat my old traumas 

are resurfacing the anxiety is only adrenaline

lit like a fuse. you cannot cancel the fourth

of july.  the wonderment in kids faces beneath the bloom 

a full moon. ascending receding

block after block. the river the

only stillness tonight. its reflection

captures my imagination